If all men are born free, how is it that all women are born slaves?
I hate people who get too preachy on your life,judge or criticize you specially when they have no idea what you are going through..
I have this cousin who loves wearing skirts but recently because of some preachy people and a series of incidents she has vowed never to wear them..
I went out for lunch with my friend Oindy today and while we were discussing about things she told me about how someone passed a nasty comment to her friend from college in the canteen and no one supported the girl because she was wearing a denim short skirt and tee..!!! It was so pathetic and spineless of those people not to have given that guy a slap...
I remember going out with my sister's friends one day and some guy passed a nasty comment on one of our friends and all the guys in that group went and slapped that guy..
But I dint like it,i wondered about what would have happened if she would have been alone...?
Usually women silently ignore these nasty comments,whistles or even vulgar songs aimed at them...But if you take a moment and try to think about the level of humiliation or shame she feels because of that person, its disgusting...The dirty gaze and the nasty comments make us check ourselves in a crowd but do we realize that maybe it is not our fault...Maybe instead of checking ourselves that person should check himself and no matter what we wear no one has the right to pass nasty comments at us..
We live in a country where eve teasers and rapists are supported by politicians and when a woman is raped we are more interested in judging whether she was wearing obscene clothes or visiting late night parties instead of giving her justice...
How does our choice of clothes decide our chances of being eve teased or raped??
And when a woman is raped because she had gone to a bar or a night club we blame her as if she is some slut..
Recently a rape case was reported in my city where the victim's character was questioned just because she went for a drink at a night club and some even said it was her fault because of her choice of transport while returning from the nightclub..
Our CM even said the whole incident was framed....
Eve teasing can occur anywhere from Bus Stops,railway stations,markets,college canteens,roads,malls and even in temples(I've recently read)..
Women irrespective of what they wear face this humiliation from people but one thing which i fail to understand is "Why should we feel humiliated or shy to raise our voice?"
If we don't raise our voice now it might become regular for them or they might try taking a bigger step in future...
So if we face such an humilation in future even if it is a mere gaze we SHOULD make an issue out of it,its not wrong to shout or make a scene...
My sister often says a line in bengali that "nijer sommaan nijer haate" which means "your dignity and self respect are in your hands" and you should be the one to protect it....
I think before teaching your daughter to sing or dance its important for every girl to learn self defense techniques right from the beginning so that she is strong enough to protect herself...
Why should we go to places with our elder brothers to protect us when we have enough potential to protect ourselves...
I remember hitting a person who was sitting at the back of a bike who tried to pull my friends skirt..I had flung her water bottle on his head and their bike nearly lost balance and after a certain distance both of them fell...(by then we had escaped!!)
Indian women have come a long way from being the doormat at home to conquering the Mount Everest and reaching the moon but how is it that she remains just like an object of pleasure for some men
I have this cousin who loves wearing skirts but recently because of some preachy people and a series of incidents she has vowed never to wear them..
I went out for lunch with my friend Oindy today and while we were discussing about things she told me about how someone passed a nasty comment to her friend from college in the canteen and no one supported the girl because she was wearing a denim short skirt and tee..!!! It was so pathetic and spineless of those people not to have given that guy a slap...
I remember going out with my sister's friends one day and some guy passed a nasty comment on one of our friends and all the guys in that group went and slapped that guy..
But I dint like it,i wondered about what would have happened if she would have been alone...?
Usually women silently ignore these nasty comments,whistles or even vulgar songs aimed at them...But if you take a moment and try to think about the level of humiliation or shame she feels because of that person, its disgusting...The dirty gaze and the nasty comments make us check ourselves in a crowd but do we realize that maybe it is not our fault...Maybe instead of checking ourselves that person should check himself and no matter what we wear no one has the right to pass nasty comments at us..
We live in a country where eve teasers and rapists are supported by politicians and when a woman is raped we are more interested in judging whether she was wearing obscene clothes or visiting late night parties instead of giving her justice...
How does our choice of clothes decide our chances of being eve teased or raped??
And when a woman is raped because she had gone to a bar or a night club we blame her as if she is some slut..
Recently a rape case was reported in my city where the victim's character was questioned just because she went for a drink at a night club and some even said it was her fault because of her choice of transport while returning from the nightclub..
Our CM even said the whole incident was framed....
Eve teasing can occur anywhere from Bus Stops,railway stations,markets,college canteens,roads,malls and even in temples(I've recently read)..
Women irrespective of what they wear face this humiliation from people but one thing which i fail to understand is "Why should we feel humiliated or shy to raise our voice?"
If we don't raise our voice now it might become regular for them or they might try taking a bigger step in future...
So if we face such an humilation in future even if it is a mere gaze we SHOULD make an issue out of it,its not wrong to shout or make a scene...
My sister often says a line in bengali that "nijer sommaan nijer haate" which means "your dignity and self respect are in your hands" and you should be the one to protect it....
I think before teaching your daughter to sing or dance its important for every girl to learn self defense techniques right from the beginning so that she is strong enough to protect herself...
Why should we go to places with our elder brothers to protect us when we have enough potential to protect ourselves...
I remember hitting a person who was sitting at the back of a bike who tried to pull my friends skirt..I had flung her water bottle on his head and their bike nearly lost balance and after a certain distance both of them fell...(by then we had escaped!!)
Indian women have come a long way from being the doormat at home to conquering the Mount Everest and reaching the moon but how is it that she remains just like an object of pleasure for some men
DO you know self-defense?I think it is high time women learn to protect themselves too..
ReplyDeleteI've not taken any such training in self defense but I can protect myself physically.
DeleteGreat minds think alike! I just posted on the very same issue the other day (bit.ly/MjhKiE).
ReplyDeleteIt really infuriates me when everyone (men, as well as women, sadly) blame the victim for someone else's actions. That would be like blaming a murder victim for being killed!
I remember the first time I blogged about this, someone commented saying that I should think of the thing I find most tempting and imagine that it's lying there unprotected in front of me - implying that I would just take it. That comment just made me want to KEYBOARDSMASH. The things people say to justify their behaviour! X-/
Omg!
DeleteHow can someone possibly say something like this...I wish i could slap the hell out of such a person...
You know what there's this general mentality in our culture which presumes that every women who dresses skimpily is "asking to be raped"(according to some rapists and politicians and many other retarded people..!)..
And incidents like the 2009 Mangalore Pub attack showed not only the disrespect for women here but also that we breed violence and hatred among each other..
Basically its not about clothes or the modern approach its about the male chauvinistic approach in some Indian men that they still cannot accept that women have gone beyond the confinement of the four walls of their home and sailed the seven seas.. :)